L   A   Y   A   ! [ e L e t t e r  f o r  A m e r i c a n  Y o u n g  A d u l t s ]         h t t p : / / w w w . l a y a . c o m <<>>><<<>>><<<>>><<<>>><<<>>><<<>>><<<>>><<<>>><<<>>><<<>>><<<>>><<<>> VOLUME III    ISSUE 6    JUNE 1998 T A B L E  O F  C O N T E N T S . . . ---------------------------------------------------------------------- - A NOTE FROM THE EDITOR - THE EVOLUTION OF A LIFESTYLE (PART 4) - THE E-MAIL ERA - WHAT WE LEARNED IN THE MOVIES - ARE YOU NORMAL? L A Y A ! looks best when viewed with 10 point Arial font. <>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>     A  N O T E  F R O M  T H E  E D I T O R <>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<> Hey everyone… Wow…school's out. That's really scary, considering the fact that this hasn't kicked in yet. I still feel like I'm on a one week break or something. Sigh… Summer homework, driver's education classes, volunteer work…this sure isn't going to be an easy summer for me. Check out part four of "The Evolution of a Lifestyle" for a bit more insight into this (yes, that's the last installment…*sniff* *sob*). Just kidding. We also have "The E-mail Era," by Jennifer Chin. Ever think "point and click" letters are taking over your mind? You may be right… (Oh, and did you know that e-mail is what you're receiving this issue by and that email is a bluish color? Hyphens ARE important!) The "normal" American? Movies rotting people's common sense? It's all here. Anyways, this concludes yet another Editor's Note; stay tuned for the next issue of LAYA! Have an awesome summer and don't let your brain go to rot… Just kidding! Serena Chang Serena@laya.com <>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>   T H E E V O L U T I O N O F A L I F E S T Y L E <>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<> PART IV Over the decades, life as a teen has changed dramatically (to say the least). From Flower Power to political correctness, from "when I was your age…" to "kids have it too easy nowadays." On the contrary though, many parents of current teens NEVER say, "When I was your age, I went to bed at two in the morning," or "When I was your age, I had to do community service to graduate from high school." As a matter of fact, a number of parents haven't even heard about this new-fangled "community service." For as long as technology's impact on life increases, student's lives will become more and more complex. Computers, calculators, and spell checks will dominate, homework and community service requirements will expand, and social lives will flourish. Therefore, it is only logical that sleeping time will be condensed as time goes on. Now that finals are over and school is out, nights are shorter and the sun's reign is longer. But even though we don't have to stress over required community service hours and homework until next year, I'm still up at two in the morning and getting up at eight. Not willingly, mind you.  Well, not quite, anyways. So, maybe I could go to bed at a reasonable hour if I wanted to. It's just that school has trained me to stay up late nights in order to be able to procrastinate and finish homework and pointless projects, and thus I'm still typing away at this article at midnight. Sad, isn't it? True, I do have fellow owls up with me; friends to debate with still hanging around despite the lack of a reason to. Yes, I'm tired. Yes, I'm sleepy. But as researchers have proven, teens live the night life. As a matter of fact, they say that school should start at, oh, say eleven a.m. and end later in order to fall in sync with adolescents' natural sleep patterns. After all, there has been a severe increase in teen coffee drinkers and No Doz sales (just kidding about that last one…I wouldn't know if that statement's true or not. And for you naïve ones out there, No Doz is a pure caffeine pill designed to help you pull all-nighters). Never mind--that's another story. But perhaps this explains why crowds of us are still hanging around into the wee hours… Getting up in the morning? HA HA HA. School started at 8:12 in junior high, and what time did I get up? 8:07 functioned very nicely…and what do you know…I was never once late to class. Now that I'm in high school, well, what can I say? Nothing has changed. My carpool leaves at 7:45, and just last Friday, I woke up at 7:45. Yes, that's right…still cutting it really really really close. Anyways, it's the summer now…sigh…just love this time of year (except minus the heat, the summer school, the summer homework, and the family vacations)…and I've found myself forcibly awakened at eight in the morning every day since school let out--so much for catching up on sleep. Graduations to attend, places to go, sights to see…  I'm hoping to sleep in one of these days. I mean, I honestly slept in later during the school year than I do now. Why does the world work on a nine to five daily schedule? People, from researchers to parents, say that lack of sleep causes pimples, premature aging symptoms, and loss of common sense, amongst other things. As to how much of this is true, I can't say. But, using logic, I have come to the conclusion that the fact I left my art final in my carpool's trunk has nothing to do with lack of sleep (that project's due next year now. Long story). My dad may be enjoying blaming my life's problems on the fact I'm "not getting any" (sleep, that is, you sick-minded people), but I know better. At least, I think I do. By: Serena Chang    Serena@laya.com <>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>   T H E  E - M A I L  E R A <>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<> "Sorry I can't come over right now-gotta check my e-mail." The friends of many e-mail junkies have heard this devastating phrase day after day in this time and world. After all, a new era is coming-the era of free e-mail! Across the nation, eager fingers are typing in their usernames and passwords. Eyes are staring at the screen, minds are tuned only to the humming of the computer. With their muscles tense, these people await the three words that every man and woman, child and adult, are listening for: "You have mail!" What is this terrible disease? Phone lines dropping dead, mid-conversation: "I'm getting my mail," they say. "Sorry, have to go now, my e-mail is calling me!" The end of personal connections is nearing. Alexander Graham Bell's wonderful invention, the telephone, has been cast aside. This breakthrough in communications now sits quietly as its busy owner types furiously into a blank white box. Worthless words, meaningless phrases, go into this small screen. Friends, the unafflicted, ask, "Want to do something this Saturday?" The e-mail addicts reply, "Do something? You mean like check my e-mail?" No! What has happened to the youths of today's world? They no longer go outside and play. Instead, they absorb themselves in free e-mail!     One of the most foreboding services is Hotmail. They have upgraded themselves, been bought out, upgraded again, and ultimately, increased their capacities. Hundreds of people in this very town are subscribed to Hotmail, and even on beautiful Sunday afternoons are sitting indoors, mechanically clicking on the "In-Box" link. Even people who lack Internet access are able to send and receive FREE e-mail with the aid of Juno. And for those willing, there are some e-mail services that are better, reaching higher! These offer more options and choices, for, well, a small price of course. Nevertheless, there are those who are willing to pay this fee, a mere price for MORE POWER!     What is this world becoming? Adults say, "Our children are the future." But we too have been taken in by this new way to "talk" to our friends. Even we have forgotten the sounds of our voices, so captivated are we with this novelty. "Who are you?" we think at each other. "Have I met you somewhere? An e-mail conversation, perhaps?"     And believe it or not, there is danger involved in e-mail. I'm sure that everyone with an e-mail account and parents has heard-countless times: "You're not e-mailing strangers, are you?" Even now, with all the caution taken to prevent people from discovering where we live and who we are, horror stories still pop up. For example, that occasional headline in the paper, "Girl abducted by man met through Internet." But despite the warnings of mounting tension on the virtual front, we, the people, continue to fry our brains on e-mail.     Let this be a warning to you all. The next time you sit down on that comfortable chair in front of your computer, don't reach out to hit the small green button that allows you to sever your connections with the outside world. Instead, say this to yourself: "It's a beautiful day outside; I think I'd ought to go and play basketball. I'll have plenty of time to check my e-mail in the evening." Then, will yourself to do it.     *Beep!* This has been a warning of free e-mail. *Beep!* By: Jennifer Chin    septembersaphire@hotmail.com <>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>   W H A T W E L E AR N E D I N  T H E M O V I E S <>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<> Imagine you lived a secluded life, spending all your days on a tiny little island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean (no, you're not in Hawaii, here). Your only form of information and entertainment is a satellite television that allows you to view movies from all periods of time. How misguided would your life be? Here are a few of the things that you would have "learned": 1. All beds have special L-shaped cover sheets, which reach up to the armpit level on a woman, but only to the waist level on the man lying beside her. 2. If being chased through town, you can usually take cover in a passing St. Patrick's Day parade - at any time of the year. 3. All grocery shopping bags contain at least one stick of French Bread. 4. Once applied, lipstick will never rub off - even while scuba diving. 5. During all police investigations, it's necessary to visit a strip club at least once. 6. All telephone numbers in America begin with the digits 555. 7. The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window in Paris. 8. Should you wish to disguise yourself as a German officer, you don't need to speak the language. A German accent will do just fine. 9. Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communication systems of any invading alien civilization. 10. If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate any and all strange noises in their most revealing lingerie. 11. It is always possible to park directly outside the building you are visiting. 12. All bombs are equipped with electronic timing devices with large red digits so that you know exactly when they're going explode. 13. When they're alone, all non-native English speakers prefer to speak English to each other. 14. While paying for a taxi, don't look at your wallet as you take out a bill - just grab one at random and hand it over. It'll always be the exact fare. 15. A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beatings, but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds <>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>   A R E  Y O U  N O R M A L ? <>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<> NOTE: We have no idea as to how this data was collected, but that would be a great story in itself. And please, as you read this, keep in mind that 90% of people admit that they sometimes lie. Facts about Americans: did you know that... ----------------- AROUND THE HOUSE ----------------- * 21% of us don't make our bed daily. 5% of us never do. * Men do 29% of the laundry. After all, only 7% of women trust their husbands to do it correctly. * 40% of women have hurled footwear at a man. * 85% of men don't use the slit in their underwear. * 67.5% of men were tightie whities (briefs). * The average bra size today is 36C-whereas 10 years ago, it was a 34B. * 85% of women wear the wrong bra size (is there a correlation here????) --------- HABITS --------- * 58.4% have called in sick at work when we really weren't. * 3 out of 4 of us keep our dollar bills in rigid order (with ones leading up to higher denominations). * 50% admit they regularly sneak food into movie theaters to avoid the high prices of movie foods. * 39% of us peek in our hosts' bathroom cabinet. * 17% have been caught by the host. * 81.3% would tell an acquaintance to zip his pants. * 29% of us ignore RSVP. * 35% give to charity at least once a month. * 71.6% of us eavesdrop. ------ FOOD ------ * 69% eat the cake before the frosting. * When nobody else is around, 47% drink straight from the carton. * Snickers is the most popular candy. * 22% of us skip lunch daily. * 9% of us skip breakfast daily. * 66% of us eat cereal regularly. * 22% of all restaurant meals include French fries. * 14% of us eat the watermelon seeds. --------- HYGIENE --------- * 22% leave the glob of toothpaste in the sink. * Only 13% brush our teeth from side to side. * Nearly 1/3 of U.S. women color their hair. * 53% of women will not leave the house without makeup on. * 58% of women paint their nails regularly. * 33% of women lie about their weight. * 4 out of 5 of us have suffered from hemorrhoids. (I thought 4 out of 5 preferred Trident gum) * The average girl starts her period at age 12. * 30% of us refuse to sit on a public toilet seat. * 54.2% of us always wash our hands after going to the bathroom. * 23.5% admit they don't always flush. * 45.2% pee in the shower. * 44.9% pee in the ocean. * 28.1% pee in the pool. * 46.5% of men say they ALWAYS put the seat down after they've used the toilet, yet women claim to ALWAYS find it up. ====================================================================== ====================================================================== L A Y A ' s S T A F F . . . Robert Chin President robert@laya.com Daniel Cheng Layout & Design daniel@laya.com Chris Lin Perspective Editor chris@laya.com Serena Chang Editor/Lead Writer serena@laya.com ********************************************************************** If you have questions, comments, or suggestions, please e-mail "info@laya.com" ********************************************************************** SUBMIT AN ARTICLE! E-mail "submissions@laya.com" with your article. If this article was not written by you, we'd like to know who wrote it and what their e-mail address is. If it is your article, please include your name and your e-mail address. Your article may also be published anonymously (please tell us this in the e-mail). 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